Letter 11

May. 08, 2017

Didn't eat anything today. Got soup, threw it up before club meeting started. Had two cups of coffee. No food. Not hungry. Food comes up just as fast as it goes down. Can't drink water, it makes me sick. Won't have dinner either. I don't want to eat. Can't sleep. Just going to class and making conversation.

Still same day. Had dinner threw that up too. Don't have food in my stomach I feel like my body is going into shock. Disassociating so much everything is a fog, can't remember alot, brain still there, I'm not present,  I feel nothing so numb, can't even cry anymore until right now. I didn't notice I hadn't eaten in three days. I had water and some chips I found in the back of the cabinet. I can't eat. I'm not even hungry anymore. I feel like when the snow is so cold it begins to wrap you up like a long deep sleep.

dying